A Sabbatical Season Part 1: Homeless in Seattle

I am not comfortable with homeless people on the side of the road begging. I don't know where to look or how to think when I encounter them. I feel overwhelmed by the prospect of life on the street and not being able to "fix it" for them, bring them home and make them comfortable.

I used to be a missionary in the inner city of Saint John, NB and we had homeless kids that we took into our own home at the time, and in 10 of the 12 places John and I have lived, we have had people live with us who had no where else to go. So it is not like I don't care. I do.

So to BE a homeless person, has been hard to come to grips with and understand. I have worked hard and have played by the rules. I have been married to the same man for 32 years and we have raised 4 children. How is it that at this stage in my life, I have nowhere to call "home" and nowhere to unpack my belongings? And this is not the first time.

The first time I was homeless in Seattle, I lived in Tsawwassen, BC and "commuted" to Seattle to go to church where John was called to be the Rector of St. Luke's Episcopal. God had told me to look for an 8 bedroom house in which we could host people. It took me 2.5 months, but I finally found it, and we moved to Seattle.

We couldn't buy the house, so we rented for 2.5 years, and then the house sold very unexpectedly. With the help of friends, we managed to get all packed up. But there was nowhere to go. I thought perhaps the Lord would give us a house we could buy and call our own at that point, but instead, we "house sat" as one parishioner after another went on vacation. This lasted for 2.5 months as well.

The first place we were "homeless" in was a beautiful Cape Cod mansion on Highland Ave overlooking the whole of the downtown waterfront!! Even when I am homeless, I get to live like a King! So what is my problem?

I wonder if it is because I am a First Nations Canadian, Mi'kmaq (formerly known as Micmac Indians). As we know, every treaty made to the First Nations people in North America was broken. So I have real justice issues rolling around inside of me about land and home. Then I am only 3 generations away from being a slave! My grandfather was the first free-born member of my family. I have inherited from him a very strong sense of needing to be "free" that goes very deep in me. But there is also just as strong a need and desire to have a place of my own where I "belong". I have very little sense of belonging.

And if that isn't enough, I am a woman! That brings with it a whole set of needs to nest and nurture and have roots. I am getting old. Old people need a home! At least this old person does!! So maybe I can forgive myself if I am not thrilled to have no place to call my own.

So I am finding that the first lesson the Lord is teaching me during this Sabbatical Season is that I do have a home. Jesus is my home. It is a huge struggle to lay my homelessness at Jesus' feet, but the periods of time between when I set it down and pick it up again are getting longer as I stop looking at all that I don't have, and look at what I do have.

So many homeless people go to bed every night literally "on the street". Every night I have a roof over my head. These same people often don't have 1 let alone 3 meals a day. I have fat rolls to prove I don't miss many meals. I have 2 rooms full of "stuff" in storage. They might have a shopping cart full of belongings. I have a Heavenly Father who loves me, knows me by name, has a plan and a purpose for my life, and will bring it to completion. So do they, but they don't always know that. Maybe that is what God has been trying to help me understand. When you don't have the stability of a home, a base from which to operate, it is hard to do the normal things that we take for granted like keeping a job or staying healthy.

Jesus, I pray to see people as You see them. Give me compassion and love for the situations they are in. Show me how I can bless them and love them, even when I can't change or fix their situation. But above all, let me be thankful that I am not really homeless because You are my home. Amen.

I Will Bring You Home by Michael Card

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bXt-qSD6JSw

Though you are homeless, though you're alone, I will be your home, Whatever's the matter, whatever's been done I will be your home

I will be your home,I will be your home, In this fearful, fallen place I will be your home

When time reaches fullness, when I move My hand, I will bring you home Home to your own place in a beautiful land, I will bring you home

I will bring you home, I will bring you home From this fearful, fallen place I will bring you home, I will bring you home